Sunday, January 23, 2005

Living To achieve

“It’s only the thrill of the chase” she said unmoved by emotion. It seems like she’d gotten used to living like that. She seemed not to care about anything. It was easy for her to simply shrug off everything. She needed no interference in her life. She liked keeping her life clear of troubles, especially of other people. To her it seemed easy to find company & should some of the acquaintances become burdensome, she moved away to let them pass.
“There are others who can take care of them” she thought. She knew she was right. For her the only thing that mattered was her achievement. She wanted to aspire & would use any possible ladder to get there; not that she used people but knew how to work hard. It was simple for her to love & if she found good people she liked chasing them but attached no strings. She couldn’t bear the thought of being tied. She loved her freedom like a dying man loves life. Her fantasies consisted of blowing winds, standing on top of mountains & clear seas. She was in love with nature & nothing else. She wanted only that.

There was such a vast world & she wanted to be part of everything. She wanted to live away from everyone. There were better things to do. There was more life out there than hanging on to anyone or anything. She was too impatient & got bored by routine. She was restless & needed change constantly which made her pursue something new every time; that could be any person or even a subject or place. She wanted excitement & adventure so she picked up people-on-the-go. It became kind of a habit then. Perhaps it was her past that made her like that. The people she’d tried holding on to, deserted her, so she learnt to live. Or maybe it was another learning experience she subjected herself to.

She needed to survive & wanted to be prepared the best. They taught her well anyhow. She was a good learner. No one would’ve thought that she’d go this far, but then no one gave guarantees for life anyways. She wanted to turn hard. She’d planned on it. She wanted to care about no one. She wanted the love in her to die. She knew she would make it hard for others but then she made life easy for herself. She was strong enough to survive on her own. She knew that well. Others weren’t her concern. The world could find other means to survive. There was life for everyone who wished to seek it. She had her own to live.

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